5, 4, 3,...

It is almost here and when I wake up tomorrow. Well, I will eat breakfast, take the pups for a walk, maybe go back to sleep but then "Let the Year Begin!"

Dear 2010 -Is it over yet!!! ~With Love Heather

2010 is not a year I look back fondly and say “what a year.”  I love Christmas and this time of the year but I wanted to just rush past it just to get to 2011.  I have not written a New Year’s Resolution list in years because I believed that my birthday represented my own personal New Years.  I am making an exception because I cannot enter 2011 without goals and a plan. I have been blessed and appreciate all that I have.  I also know that I have not been fulfilled in life in a long, long time.  This past year has brought me to realize that there are a few things that I want to accomplish and maybe more as the year goes on, we will see. My resolution theme is Mind, Body, and Soul and my 2011 Resolutions are:

1. My relationship with God.  I stopped going to church regularly. This has always been important to me and I let it slide.  I will also put aside a little time each day 


2. Strengthen my relationships with friends.  My friends have come through for me more often than I can count.  They have become like family to me.  I don’t think I do enough to tell them thank you.  This is really important to me.


3. Redefine my relationship with my family.  This year has been an eye opener to me in regards to depending on certain family members.  I have to say, I have been deeply disappointed.  I have no right to ask them to change but my approach and expectations towards them need to.  This is not a bad thing but a necessary thing. This will be the hardest of my resolutions.


4. Cut down on the meat and eat healthier.  I love food but lately nothing taste right.  Why bother chewing if it is not satisfying. I would like to be more conscience of what I eat and I am going to work towards cutting back on the meat (aka beautiful protein).  Eat two days a week vegetarian.  


5. Weight and Health:  {don’t laugh} I know what you are saying everyone puts this on the list. This year I feel that it could not have been clearer to me about my health.  Surgery and high blood pressure is like a smack in the face.  If I want give myself the best chances of having a baby in the future, I need to make sure everything is in order.


6. Get more consistent about fitness/exercise.  I would like to buy a bike this year and start to cycle.  I would also like to start training for another marathon I am not sure which one yet.  Start doing more yoga, I miss it.


7. My Finances:  Start my budget.   I have no emergency fund.  Yes Suzie Orman you heard it right.  I have no idea how much I can put into it but anything at this point counts.  work towards finding a home this year.


8. Organize myself better:  Pull it together and quick.  This unorganized life is representing my mind at this point.  I feel like the Cathy Comic.


9. Work towards one thing on this list daily.

Maybe, this is enough to commit to right now. Whoosh I better get started!

Last Days of 2010

In these last remaining days of 2010, I am tempted to slam the door and scream "and don't come back, either!" This has not been a year for the record books, needless to say. Personal and professional crises abounded and I barely had time to recover from one before the next one hit me. It's been a tiring year and I'm ready for 2011. What's remarkable about this time of year is that there's a clear-cut beginning right around the corner. I know it's just a date on the calendar and that the problems of 2010 can easily become the problems of 2011. But this year also presents a real opportunity to reflect on my life and think seriously about what I love and what I want to be different.

To be clear, although this was a difficult year, I am not ungrateful for the opportunities and wonderful things that fill my life. I am well aware that I am lucky. Just the same, I have been turning around a long list of things in my head that I feel I could work on in the coming year. In no particular order:

1. Improve my relationship with my mother. This year was especially difficult in this respect. My mother has struggled for many, many years with alcohol abuse and it has obviously affected our relationship in a million ways. In October she hit a crisis point and decided to get sober and change her life. I think that's amazing and support her efforts 100%. The challenge for 2011 will be to rebuild the trust and mother-daughter relationship that I know we both want. This is a difficult, personal, and painful thing to do and it's not something I relish the idea of sharing. I'm doing it because I know that there are plenty of flaws that I contribute that hold our relationship back and perpetuate the patterns that we have established. I want to think about what I am doing that makes it hard for us to be honest with each other. I think that if we could be open I could be a good source of support for her while she's getting her life back on track. If it stays like this, all we'll have is surface level phone calls where we tell each other that everything's fine.

2. Eat less processed sugar. This is pretty self-explanatory and I know I am not alone with this. I am eating way too much crap and not nearly enough fruits and veggies. In recent weeks I have been making a solid effort to put more good stuff in every meal but I am still reaching far too often for sugary stuff and/or plain carbs. This is going to be a serious pain-in-the butt habit to break, but I know it will be worth it.

3. Find a way to relaunch StoneArch Cakery. This probably conflicts hilariously with the above resolution, but just the same, I really want to get back into making party and special occasion cakes. I had to let the new (ok, infant) business go when my ex-husband and I split because I left the house that we shared. StoneArch was a home-based cake business that was just getting going when we divorced. I have a couple of ideas for ways to make this happen, so stay tuned.

4. Prioritize my life better. This could be renamed "Why is cleaning so high on my list?" Granted, a clean house does make me quite happy, but why do I spend so much time doing it? There must be a way around it. Maybe picking up a little every night? Maybe letting a little more go? What is the answer here? I think this will take a couple of different systems before finding the right one.

5. Be a better friend. There are a million reasons that I am busier than I would like to be (and making myself busy by doing boring crappy stuff like cleaning: see above) but I need to make more time to see the people that make me smile. I hate that I am always saying how long it's been, how we should get together, ect ect. I love my friends and need and want to see them more face-to-face.

6. Get back on the shop ride. Athletic goals are hard because you never know when you'll be injured or crash, or whatever else. In April of 2010 I crashed during a shop ride and really messed up my hip. I haven't been on a serious group ride since because the thought of it makes me a little queasy. I need to get back in a group. I miss riding with my bike friends and improve so much by riding with faster people. No more excuses, this year I will get back on the group ride. Oh, I will also go get the hip xrayed again.

7. Improve my triathlon 5K time and improve my overall 1/2 Iron time at Patriots in September. This is going to mean speed work, which I hate. I am a total cardio junkie and hate speed work and weight training. Let's just say I need to get comfortable being uncomfortable. It's good for the soul. Embrace pain. I got this.

8. Improve finances. I lost my job last March and although I got a new one in July, I haven't been adding to my retirement fund. I am committing to getting back to that. I also will pay off my credit card and start a small savings fund.

Ok, that's enough for now. I think that ought to get me started. Suggestions and comments are welcome and I look forward to getting this plan underway.